• Home
  • About Me
  • Contact Me
  • Grief & Loss
  • Homeschool
  • Designs & Shop
  • Recipes

Hope & Loss

January 4, 2014 · Leave a Comment

Everyone’s journey of loss is different yet the same. If you have lost someone close to you I am deeply sorry and my heart breaks for you. When we lost our first child during labor it was devastating. It literally felt like someone had stolen my soul and abandoned me with the pain physically and emotionally. I was lost and broken and didn’t even know where to begin.

I struggled with finding who I was. What my marriage was going to be like. How my world would be. I no longer wanted to be a part of it and I wanted to curl up in the bed with blankets over my head and never face the emptiness that was there. When I hear of someone who lost their baby I am heartbroken. I know all too well the feelings, the pain, the hopelessness that they are feeling. Although our losses and the way we grieve are different the overwhelming feelings of sadness, the tears, the raw emotions of the tragedy that they are struck with always come with the territory.

I know the pain and the cries that come from deep within. I know the anger, the denial, the isolation as well. If you have lost a baby, Oh how I pray that you are surrounded with love and kindness during this time and if you are past those early days I am rejoicing with you for your courage.

I also know the feelings of a deep love for my child with in my soul I can’t give up, fewer tears, putting your two feet on the ground, opening the curtains and that tiny glimpse of sunshine forcing it’s way through the glass directly on your cheek where your tears have stained.  I know the feeling of desperation for something normal to surround you again.

I know the feeling of hope.

Hope that the Lord has shown me through the sunshine each day, the rain that falls from the clouds, the mountains that soar the sky, the ocean waves that crash into the shore but leave calmly. Hope that the Lord has shown me through friendships, bible study, my husband, my family, his grace, and so much more.

I rest in hope in the faith that I have. I rest in hope in what I believe in this world. I rest in hope at the feet of Jesus where my child and other babies have gone before us escaping the sin of this world in his mighty kingdom. I rest in hope with the love and comfort I have received so I can give that same love and comfort.

Life is a gift. It is a miracle. It is precious. It is fragile. After losing Payton we were blessed beyond measure (although it wasn’t an easy journey) to have our sweet Connor and Campbell. I do not take it for granted. They are my life. They bring me so much joy. I am so thankful for the gift to be their mother.

But I still lost Payton. She changed me forever and I will always miss her. Even after all this time, the tears come and go, and a piece o my soul is gone but I choose joy in the journey and what is to come. Time hasn’t healed my heartache. Jesus redeemed my heartache.

That is why I have hope.

We live in a fallen world and with that comes the heartache, the sadness, the loss, the tragedies. But what also comes with that is God’s purpose and glory at the other end. I sometimes wonder if my heartaches have allowed me to truly know the joy that I have through it all. Without the heartache that I have experienced would I truly have the hope in Jesus and the joy that I do?

We must have hope to come out of the other side of our heartache and loss. This is my hope through my loss. It may not look like  yours. Our journeys may take different paths but we are in this life together and I pray that that our hope in this world will carry on for ourselves and for others. I will always live a life of loss but my heart is open wide with the good that happens in our world.We see so many people who have experience tragedies and are able to carry on. We see amazing random acts of kindness and people extending a hand to the homeless. How can you not have hope in this world when we are surrounded by perfect and beautiful people that God created in his image. It’s not a perfect world, that is yet to come, but it is a world of love, grace, and hope even after loss.

Share this:

  • Share
  • Twitter
  • Email
  • Pinterest
  • Facebook

Filed Under: Faith, Family, Grief & Loss, Uncategorized

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

H! I'm Angie and I am so happy you have stopped by. I share little bits of our life, love, faith, homeschool, grief & loss, style, farm, how Jesus mended my broken heart, my love for food, coffee, and all things animals! I hope you leave here refreshed and encouraged.

Hi Loves!

  • Bloglovin
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
March 2021
M T W T F S S
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
22232425262728
293031  
« Jun    

Chalkola + Birthday

We celebrated our sweet girl turning 12 years old! She loves all things horses, rainbows, and farm animals. I loved being able to spoil her with her favorites for the day. Riding horses, horse and rainbow cake, family time, pizza, and this adorable Chalkola Chalkboard. I am not an artist but the Chalkola brand chalk […]

Share this:

  • Share
  • Twitter
  • Email
  • Pinterest
  • Facebook

His Love

This world is full of sorrow and suffering and death. But thankfully, this world isn’t it for us. Because of God’s greatest gift of salvation, we have the hope of the world to come, where there is no suffering and peace surpasses everything.  The storms that are raging and crashing all around us….will stop. That sickness […]

Share this:

  • Share
  • Twitter
  • Email
  • Pinterest
  • Facebook

Flourish Beauty

Flourish Beauty

Categories

  • Awkward & Awesome
  • Beauty
  • Faith
  • Family
  • Farm
  • Fashion
  • Fun
  • Getaways
  • Giveaway
  • Grief & Loss
  • Homeschool
  • Marriage
  • Motherhood
  • Recipes
  • Uncategorized

supportHQ.net Hosting

Archives

Theme Design By Studio Mommy · Copyright © 2021

loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.