Mommy Knows Best? Raising a child with Sensory Processing Disorder

Have you ever struggled being a mother of a child you know something just isn’t right and the doctors look at you like your crazy. That’s this mom right here.

Four years ago, my son was diagnosed with Sensory Integration (also called Sensory Processing Disorder). It took almost two years for the diagnosis. I was not familiar with it at all. I begin reading about SPD and learning about all the symptoms that come along with it. There is a lot to it, since it is a broad spectrum of symptoms and types of Sensory Processing.

As his mother I knew something just wasn’t right. I remember it starting at nine months old when he wouldn’t eat baby food. It as a huge struggle. He finally would eat some but was very picky even that young. The pediatrician would say he will grow out of it. He didn’t.

As he got older we would struggle with textures even more on different levels. From touch to taste and then even to auditory and sight. I remember he never would touch his play dough or get wet or dirty. If his feet would touch the grass or he had a speck of dirt on him we would easily have “meltdowns” I called them. He wasn’t being bad or throwing a tantrum he couldn’t control the overwhelming feeling that emerged.

I was feeling like a failure as a mom and not understanding what to do or where to turn. I decided on occupational therapy two days a week in the home and I would do it the others days on my own as well. It was tough, especially with a newborn, but I survived. The doctors are still not as involved as I would like them to be, being it is not a medical diagnose that is treated with medication. However, through therapy and lots of research there has been lots of improvements. When I look back and remember how hard it was for my child to get dressed in the morning or the anxiety he would feel if someone touched him with dirty hands at the playground. He hasn’t grown out of it but he has improved adapting.

Each child’s sensory processing disorder is different, although there are similarities, but not every therapy or resource out there will work for you. If your child is diagnosed with SPD my advice to you as a mother, go with your gut.

Four years later we have far better days than before with the “meltdowns” but we still have them. I still cut all the tags out of his clothes. He has to carry his own hand sanitizer for the most part because of the smells and feeling dirty. We have phases where he wears the same shoes or style of clothing for months on end. For a while now we play with play dough{with the help of initially using wooden spoons to plastic bags and gloves over his hands} but we still don’t finger paint. That’s ok. He will do it when he’s ready. He loves to paint though as long as he has a brush.

Our biggest hurdle is food. He is very picky about food, textures, colors, smells, tastes. The pediatricians still say he will grow out of it and I do hope he does. I can not rush introducing new foods and I have to be careful in how I approach him. I never lie or trick him into trying new foods. I have tried and it made the situation even worse. Patience is better than desperation.

I actually made the mistake yesterday of offering apple sauce. Mommy knows best. The texture of applesauce is probably one of the textures that will create an instant panic attack for him.  Messy, kind of grainy, and the smell is not for him. He volunteered and I accepted, because I was so proud and still am, but deep down inside I was telling myself this is not the time. {Mind you we are in the car waiting for daddy and I had an on the go applesauce pack} It wasn’t pretty and I basically just tortured my child with applesauce while the other child is dry heaving {she has the weak stomach} because her brother is gagging and spitting out the applesauce with tears coming down his cheeks. {Insert feeling like a failure mommy moment} but we were able to get past it and I even had to make fun of myself later and laugh so I knew everything is good.

I have been researching a lot of his symptoms and relation to a gluten-free diet. I will keep you posted. I could share so much about SPD and my child. I could also share that through this diagnosis I have learned that I too, have SPD, and how it is really hard sometimes for my son and I to sync.

This has just been on my heart a lot lately and I know a lot of momma’s and their babies struggle with this.

Please know you are not alone. I am hoping to write more about this with his progress. I haven’t shared before on my blog and I don’t share a whole lot about it, but I need to.  I need to stop worrying about who knows and feeling like I need to protect him. It doesn’t change who he is.  We need to know to support each other because being a mom with a child who is out of sync you can feel alone, like a failure, and completely lost. But you’re not. You are the perfect mother for you child and you will learn so much along the way and all the blessings that do come with it too.

Does your child have Sensory Processing Disorder? I would love to hear from you!

For more information and resources on Sensory Processing Disorder please visit SPD Foundation.