This Last Month

This last month has been a flood of emotions, thoughts, trials, joys, loves, blessings, and lots of little things all rolled into one. I have loved. I have healed. I have hurt. I have cried. I have grown. I have seen. I have shared. I have failed. I have seen the beauty in the messy mundane days of this world.

I have been working very hard on being present with my children and family and not letting all of the to do lists and technology take away my time and focus with them. I want to be truly present not just saying uh huh and walking right past them to finish another task. The hardest time has really been with my husband. We get so focused on our jobs and what we have to do each day we easily lost track of our “being present” with each other. It’s a challenge but worth it for our marriage and our children. TO show my children what a marriage should be, how we should love each other unconditionally, and set a Godly example for them. They need to see me falling to me knees praying. Daily.

With the challenges I have faced and the schedules that are overwhelming God reminds me he is always here by my side. I have been very busy and during this busy time we have had to schedule surgery for our son next week. He will be having his tonsils and adenoids removed. He has sleep apnea and repeated strep since November. As a mom I want to protect my child and make it all better so this has made me very nervous but I know he will feel better and God is looking over it all. All the while I have been in pain for years for a ruptured disc in my neck with nerve damage. I have done PT, medications, injections, and acupressure/deep tissue massage and there is little to no relief. It is discouraging so I am actually in the process of scheduling my cervical spinal fusion in the next couple of weeks and knowing the recovery and the help that will be needed will require lots of patience, love, and faith in God. I have prayed for a long time to have the surgery and I feel that is the best option for my situation. So if you could please say some prayers for my family and I am very appreciated of it!

During these times it’s easy to get caught up in the stress but God reminds me he is here. As I was writing all of our to do’s down today for the next few weeks with the end of school and two surgeries, God reminded me my challenges are temporary.  This reminder brought me such peace and encouragement. If I keep my eyes fixed on him this too shall pass bringing me closer to eternity with him. He knows my futures, he planned my days, it’s up to me run this marathon and finish faithfully.